just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize