FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
