How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize