It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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