i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
two words...techno handjob
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
