how can u be prego again
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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