$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize