You're my little dorito
Michael Bay diarrhea
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
