yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
