is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
