Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
