Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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