Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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