drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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