just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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