Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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