She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
