The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
