I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
