hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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