i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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