Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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