If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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