Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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