let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
