If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
