Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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