the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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