This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
