When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
