I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
