i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize