He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
