Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I can't trust your balls anymore.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
