Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
