He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize