We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
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