he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
