Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
