So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
