uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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