evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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