i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
