You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
