We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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