I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
