I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
