i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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