erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
