Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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