And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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